Tuesday, February 2, 2010

My favorite Chuck Norris facts and videos

Everyone knows Chuck Norris is the man. Here are some of my favorite Chuck Norris facts, ranked in no specific order :) There's too many to mention, actually.

Chuck Norris destroyed the periodic table, because Chuck Norris only recognizes the element of surprise.

There is no "ctrl" button in Chuck Norris' computer. Chuck Norris is always in control.

Google won't search for Chuck Norris because it knows you don't find Chuck Norris, he finds you.
In fact, if you "find chuck norris" on google and press "i'm lucky", you'll get the screen below.

Chuck Norris puts the laughter in manslaughter

For some, the left testicle is larger than the right one. For Chuck Norris, each testicle is larger than the other one.

If at first you don't succeed, you're not Chuck Norris.

When Chuck Norris does a pushup, he isn't lifting himself up, he's pushing the Earth down.

Chuck Norris can divide by zero.

When the Boogeyman goes to sleep every night, he checks his closet for Chuck Norris.

Chuck Norris does not sleep. He waits.

In a fight between Batman and Superman, the winner would be Chuck Norris

Fire does not burn Chuck Norris, Chuck Norris burns fire.

Superman owns a pair of Chuck Norris pajamas.

Chuck Norris is suing Myspace for taking the name of what he calls everything.

Here's why Chuck Norris can never become a video game character. The game would be too easy.

And here is what Chuck Norris likes to do for fun, when he's not out beating the hell out of every person he sees:

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